Overcoming Heartbreak Without Fatal Retaliation

overcoming heartbreaks fatal retaliation

By Adeyinka Akintunde, The Nation

Deji Adenuga, the man who burnt and killed eight family members of a lady simply known as Titi has sent shock waves across the nation.

Titi had called off the love relationship with him and the fleeing Adenuga thought to pay her back by pouring petrol in her family bedroom while they slept and set it on fire.

Eight members of her family were burnt beyond recognition.

According to the Public Relations Officer of the Ondo State Police Command, Mr Femi Joseph, Titi is the only survivor of the unfortunate incident for now.

But she is in critical conditions in the hospital while Adenuga is on the run.

This is one painful situation youths today find themselves. There is the possibility of being in love with someone that does reciprocate.

It is even possible for a young man to ask a lady for a relationship and she turns his request down.

There are ways to handle this situation to prevent a severe damage or committing a criminal offence. Some include:

1. Give yourself time to grieve

After the rejection, don’t be afraid to feel any emotions that come your way. Sadness, anger, fear, and similar feelings are all natural parts of rejection, and working through them now will make it far easier to move on in the future.

Don’t be afraid to cry or scream when you’re alone. If you can, talk through your feelings with a close friend, family member or therapist. Sharing your emotions with a supportive, understanding person can make a huge difference in your mental well-being.

2. Think about why she said no

Though returning to the rejection may hurt, doing so after grieving can help you better understand what happened and gain some closure. If you believe your crush said no because she dislikes something about you, think about whether it is something you should change or if it is a simple matter of preference.

3. Be kind to her afterwards

This is sometimes hard to do because if your crush is someone you see a lot, it is normal to experience some awkwardness after a rejection. But nerves will cool down in the long run, and then your normal friendship can resume. Until then, try to be as kind, friendly, and polite to her as you can.

4. Keep yourself busy

Try picking up a brand new hobby or an old job that you have not touched in a while. If that is not enough to take your mind off things, try setting a personal goal you want to achieve. The busier you are, the easier time you’ll have getting over the rejection.

5. Remember that rejection is not a personal attack

In most cases, romantic rejection is not a criticism of your character. If your crush decides she doesn’t want you, it doesn’t mean she dislikes you or even finds you unattractive. Though every instance of rejection is different, the common thread is that “you” are not rejected.

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