Oct 19, 2012 – My Pastor Impregnates Me – He’s Married Should I Abort It Or Keep It?
Below is an unedited email dated Oct 15 received from an anonymous woman who needs your input.
She is based in the UK and she attends a Redeem Church.
She is pregnant for her married pastor and she’s confused if she should keep the baby or abort it.
Read the story below and kindly give her your inputs.
I don’t need to hide my identity anymore, as my church members and others are already aware of this development. I am based in the United Kingdom and a member of the Redeemed Christian Church of God here in the UK. I am a 24-year-old Nigerian girl. I have lived in the UK for over five years, running into my 6th year already. However, as it is generally held, “life is not always smooth and straight” I understand that life, most of the time is full of ‘zig and zag’ just like it’s characterized with ups and downs. My story is not different after all. I have had my good times too, and I consider this time as my most trying moment.
I am writing this note, not exactly because I regret my action of taking full control of a married Pastor, but because I have sensed something that is really not going to work for me in the most positive way, if I keep this pregnancy. I don’t regret my action because I understand that pastors too are human beings, and have the same feelings like the rest of us. He slept with me, got me impregnated; so what?
However, a little of the background will give you an insight into how it all started. I understand that as human beings, we cannot cheat nature. I’m one of the Choristers in the church, and there is this magnet that pulls the pastor and I together. It is like a magnetic force. However, he had explained to me in the most pathetic way one day on how the wife had starved him of sex for months all in the name of spirituality. He only said that passively anyway. He also complained bitterly, while I listened with superlative attention on how the wife hardly ever satisfy him on bed. I actually wanted to satisfy him, as I’m such an emotional and considerate person. I am very sure God won’t judge me negatively because of my kind gesture. I only tried to satisfy a man who was dying of hunger, he was been starved of sex and I had to leave spirituality behind to get him satisfied.
I remember how it all started, and like a Hollywood movie, the scenes reeled from one to the other and we had our fun in different hotels after every church meeting. I must always wait for the Pastor who will convey me to my house. After all, he is a pastor, and no one would suspect that any ‘dirty’ romance was going on between us. He confessed that I had made him feel like a woman, and I was just proud of myself. I will always node in exhilaration knowing very well that if I can satisfy another man, then I can satisfy my man. This is something every young lady should be proud of. I am not trying to patronize my action, but only being reasonable about some sensitive sexual matters.
Yes, we did, and since then, I have been excommunicated from the church. In fact, the whole thing remained secret until he got me impregnated, and I confronted him for an abortion. To my consternation, he refuted my suggestion; he wanted me to keep the baby. I had moved against it. I had given him reasons why I shouldn’t keep the baby. I don’t want to jeopardize my dream of getting married at the age of 26 which is just less than a year. I told him that I must get rid of the baby. But he has vowed to sue me if I do. He is happy that at least what he had waited for endlessly since he got married in 2000 has come to fruition as God has finally opened the doors through me. Yes, he never had a child since he got married, and age is really not on his side. I can’t get his words off my head; “ I want this baby like yesterday” he said.
This disagreement has put me in the public glare today as my close friends whom I divulged the situation to, had reported the matter to the church committee, and I have since been excommunicated. Everybody talks about me as if I have done something so strange. My concern really is not about what people are saying but to get a little piece of your advice on whether I should keep the baby against my wish, or go for an abortion. I know what I want but I still need your advice in order to justify the action I’m about to take. In the next five days, I should be able to take a major decision. Thank you for publishing my story.
January 15, 2013 at 4:31 PM
my dear, no man has a right to judge u for any reason, you keep that baby, ur true man wil stil locate you. All i wil ask of you is to move on with life. Of cos God has already forgiven you. Do not denie d baby access to live just as u do.
January 18, 2013 at 9:08 PM
U are disgrace to Christendom, repent or u perish.
January 22, 2013 at 7:48 PM
please keep it so that you do not commit another sin, but repent of this one sin. also discuss this you pastor and parents. may God see you through the nine months
January 29, 2013 at 10:30 PM
pls sis if what u a saying i true pls i ll implore u 2 keep d baby,pls visit my 2go line 4 serious chat lets c if i can help.
February 1, 2013 at 9:59 PM
U re so stupid, for sleepin wit ur pastor n u knw he is already married. Ma advice 4 u is to kip d pregenancy oooo, coz if u dear abort it Allah will surely punish u. Fuck u
February 5, 2013 at 7:41 PM
pls my sister dont abort the baby a lot of woman is out there looking for a child they have gone true a lot of test,even IVF treatment,but they cant even have a child of there own,this is GOD gift he make it possible for u to get pregnant there is no bastard any were,the baby is urs if u had the baby,in the bible when people are trowing stone to a prostitute and JESUS came to the sin and said if any of u people have not comite any crime b/f then u can trow it.
February 7, 2013 at 10:30 AM
Please my dear don’t abort the baby. Children are gift from God, if u abort it God will be very upset by not giving u a child when u will finally get married. So please save the child coz u don’t know what he/she will become in life, Thanks.
January 16, 2019 at 2:34 PM
I do not agree. Why do you think so much ?This is a case of consensual sex, there is no love present.
Better to abort it.Who takes care of his education and parenting ?As a single parent, it will become difficult to marry in future.
February 7, 2013 at 10:34 AM
Child is gift from God please don’t play with it. U might not know what the child will become in life. Thanks
akinbobuyi samuel babatunde
February 15, 2013 at 8:25 PM
please, don’t abort the baby, why should you do that? are you a comforter? just keep on with your life.
February 20, 2013 at 11:23 AM
U can think of any thing but not 2 abort the innocent child. U have 2 inquire from your pastor wheather he will marry u and give his former wife a certificate of divorce as it is in the bible or not. If he marries u, both u should go 2 god in prayers 4 forgiveness and happy home. If he dosn’t marry u, ask god 2 forgive u and give u your own husband. However (though your conscience is already judging u) you behaved very devilish by giving yourself 2 your pastor 4 sex (though 2 your pastor’s demand) in place of his wife.
March 7, 2013 at 8:32 AM
God will forgive u 4 not killing on born child. go back to authority of the church 4 help and don’t condemn ur self. This will be a leason 4 others, God Bless.
March 8, 2013 at 12:01 AM
wow!!! Wat a story! Well, honestly dear u r wrong 4 tryin to satisfy ur pastor SEXUALY. Bt dnt go 4 abortion if u really dnt want GOD to nt get mor angry wit u ….
Just keep d baby and ask GOD to 4give u and ur pastor. YOU’RE BLESSED.!
March 27, 2013 at 3:57 PM
ha ya done well take annioting na church and for bed too uhmmmmmm. U too pass mark
April 10, 2013 at 2:48 PM
U better live the Baby, b’coz u don’t knw what wil happen during the abortion.
April 14, 2013 at 8:10 AM
Do not abort d baby, ask God, d wife n congregation for forgiveness, even give d baby to d dad n bigger mum, n go get ur life. Maybe God is using u to bless dem, wich mins d baby will ve two mummies n a dad to show him luv
April 22, 2013 at 2:07 PM
Do not abort the child,even if the pastor didn’t marry you born the child and take very good care of the child for better future,it doesn’t stop you from marrying afresh the right man for your life,but your mentality is too bad through your statement I just red by not regarding what you have done to be bad,relax and follow it gradually it is well.
May 2, 2013 at 9:10 PM
U r a fool a very stupid one at dat u said becos of ur kind gesture u decided to satisfy his hunger so keep d baby is part of d satisfaction nd pls try to be remosful 4 once in ur life what u did is very bad nd should not be discussed in public gossh dont u have shame? May god 4give u men satisfier.
May 2, 2013 at 11:16 PM
u r a nominal or floating christian, there’s no iota of Godliness in u, 4 hving d mouth to say that God will not judge u negatively.D bible says:’If we confess our sins, God is faithful and just to forgive us’For all of u who r saying that pple shld not echo judgment shld go and read Hebrew 10:26 and it reads:’For if we sin wilfully after we hv received d knowledge of d truth, there remains no more sacrifice 4 sins’ Sister, u hv a reprobate heart and unless u seek really repentance u cannot be forgiving. u also said u did it out of kind gesture, what we r talking her is fornication/adultery with a man of God:what two of u sow u pple will reap, truth is bitter! 4 d innocent child don’t abort,bt know that u don’t hv conscience and remember that every sin has its consequences even after u hv repented, especially this type.
May 2, 2013 at 11:43 PM
u r a nominal or floating christian. There’s no godliness in u or fear of God. secondly, u hv a reprobate heart, so seek genuine repentance. Remember what we r talking here is fornication with a man of God/flesh.There are sins that lead to death and every sin has its consequences, especially this type.u and dos saying that judgment shld not be echoed shld read Hebrew 10:26:’For if we sin wilfully after we hv received the knowledge of the truth, there remains no more sacrifice for sins.’ we should stop liberalizing and watering God’s word and taking His grace and mercy for granted.4 D INNOCENT child don’t abort!
October 4, 2013 at 10:34 AM
What is the situation report in connection with pregnant lady who was seeking for advice from UK?
November 18, 2013 at 11:20 AM
you have allowed yourself to be used by the devil and this should be a warning to others. Well, the did has been done, pray for God’s forgiveness and keep the baby. Get the church elders or any important person to accompany you to the wife and beg her for forgiveness. Pls keep d inocent baby cos u are mother and pastor is the father. Give him the chance to live. Your man will come. Uncle Godstime.
July 22, 2014 at 1:41 PM
do not abort it because it may lead to another problem
October 20, 2015 at 7:08 PM
Keep the baby! Pastors are human beings too and have feelings. What matters is your relationship with God hereafter. Don’t go to the wife, she has failed in her duties. If all wives could make their husband’s ever happy, the world would be a better place. In the worst case, give me the baby.
October 20, 2015 at 7:20 PM
Keep the baby. Don’t feel sorry about yourself. Don’t contact the wife, she has already failed in her duties. Pastors are human beings too and it is sad to take them as supper natural. This shud open eyes of Pastors’ wives! Don’t worry what people say, each one of us has their dark side. Your Pastor is still Godly, pls respect him for that n let him see his baby. What matters hereafter is your personal relationship with God. In the worst case scenario, pls give me that baby!