Connect with us

NaijaGists.com – Proudly Nigerian DIY Motivation & Information Blog

Linda Ikeji Is Single & Looking For Husband At 33: Calabar Man Writes Marriage Proposal To Her

Hot Gists

Linda Ikeji Is Single & Looking For Husband At 33: Calabar Man Writes Marriage Proposal To Her

linda ikeji single and looking

Sept 26, 2013 – Linda Ikeji Is Single & Looking For Husband At 33: Calabar Man Writes Marriage Proposal To Her

Well sha I just stumbled on the news that this delectable beauty just turned 33 and would be celebrating her birthday in England, far away from me. Since she has decided to carry herself that far, let me quickly let her know my intentions towards her before one person out there without papers pour sand sand for my garri.

Linda Baby, I have spoken to you on a few occasions, I am that Investment Banker who has been trying to get you to partner with one of my clients.  Each time I call, you will pick the phone and in a smooth chocolaty voice turn down my request. I will just smile cos I know that you really do not understand the opportunity you are missing.

One day as I was doing some research, I stumbled on the valuation of your blog and I screamed. I decided to pursue you through other means. Since you no gree business, let me kuku chase you. If you become my girlfriend, we can build a family business with me as the Chairman and you as my deputy.

I am offering you the opportunity to be a Calabar wife. This position comes with so much perks, that all your friends will die with envy. First after capturing you, I will send you to Uyo to my mama, so she will teach you the fine art of pounding yam and cooking Afang.  You will need these skills to build a successful career in my house. This would take you a whole four weeks, because as I see you so, we would need to build your muscles first before we start. Ma Calabar will also have to teach you how to pull out periwinkle from its shell.

When you are through, you will now come back to Lagos and be introduced to your senior wife, who will also teach you the wonderful culinary skills of boiling Indomie. Now this has to be taken seriously, because it’s the only thing I eat after work. You will also be involved in school runs, so the Nanny can rest a bit. You will sleep on the floor as I do not expect your senior would allow you share our bed just yet. You will remove the wigs and revert to Calabar braids, cut your nails and start  using palm oil for your skin.

At 33, you are at the ripe age to join the family business. All these blog thing will have to stop, I don’t like the exposure. You will be involved in selling Garri. You have all it takes to make the business grow. You can talk and you have long hands that would be useful in dipping inside the bag while measuring the kondo as you sell.

You will not call me by name, you will always refer to me as Baba Etekamba and you must kneel each time you bring food for me to eat. You will never dish my food but you will be the expert in charge of serving it. You will also work closely with the driver to ensure that all the cars are in tip top shape. You will be allocated the only tokunbo car in the garage for your use, when you are going to the market.

This whole thing is looking very exciting, kindly send your application letter, stating very clearly, ‘ ‘Application to marry you Sir’. You can send it through Aloba, because he would be on the panel that would scrutinize your request and recommend your engagement or otherwise. Teeheee!!!!

Happy birthday my darling and God bless you and give you many more fruitful years. The wicked will not see you and you will continue to be a beacon of hope in our society. Stay blessed.

[Article by JOSEPH SAMPSON EDGAR]

23 Comments

23 Comments

  1. Onome Baby

    September 26, 2013 at 3:22 AM

    Who will marry this old cargo when girls in the early 20s are still searching?
    better get a man to give you belle before u enter menopause

  2. tanya ilori

    September 26, 2013 at 3:29 AM

    As old and wealthy as you are, you have no man to call your own? ur case is sorry.
    May be she is looking for a saint to marry

  3. Ojukwu

    September 26, 2013 at 4:51 AM

    My dear never mind wat they r sayin bt believe in God at d right time,ur dream husband wil surface.

  4. Justice

    September 26, 2013 at 6:34 AM

    Who will not look for her if only she is looking for s real ?
    She doesn’t ask for prostitution but for a marriage, why can’t we encourage her?
    You are welcome if you are interested in a real man, I can find for you my Dear !

  5. ifeanyi

    September 26, 2013 at 6:42 AM

    linda i think its high time you start looking for a partner.if you have got none.cause i knnw quite well that your money cant marry you.so the earlier the better. 08036550329 feel free to call for more advice.

  6. Beaty Toni

    September 26, 2013 at 7:26 AM

    this is a big joke right?hahaha

  7. D Hunter

    September 26, 2013 at 7:55 AM

    Hahahahaha i laughed in English, wat a marriage proposal letter? dis guy‘ll kill me o. I am single bt nt searching o.

  8. red

    September 26, 2013 at 8:08 AM

    Linda u are on top of millions with ur achievement which of course will generate insult and hateful words just to put u down.I apologize on behalf of d calabar man,he can’t control his wet dreams for u again that why his crying out for help.

  9. LAWAL OPEYEMI

    September 26, 2013 at 8:23 AM

    i really want 2 marry u please call me on 08060096802 or send me ur number please b4 2mmorrow thanks

    • Rosy

      December 27, 2014 at 1:58 PM

      Hahahahahahaha. Opeyemi do you think she will stupped so low,pls get better things to do with your life.(just an advice

  10. Okotaoburu

    September 26, 2013 at 8:39 AM

    Hahahahahahhahahhahaakikikikikikikukukukukukukukukuuu!!! OMG! Craze piple full 9ja ooo! If i b linda, e beta mak i no marry 4 life than marrying dis f**kin oil n garri investment banker!! Lol. Bros ehhhh, get dis in2 ur f**kin ears! Woman get level ooo!! Go find ur level ooo 4 ur side, bitch A**!!!

  11. Jibike

    September 26, 2013 at 9:01 AM

    Haba! this is too much o.

  12. emmajesus

    September 26, 2013 at 9:16 AM

    Keep playing hard to get why other girls get married every saturday….

  13. bezo

    September 26, 2013 at 12:04 PM

    She is just too ugly maybe I would have managed her, but I can’t just manage this ugly mucheche

  14. me

    September 26, 2013 at 12:40 PM

    @ onome and tanya, u guys are big fools. U don’t know how ur own tommorrow would turn out and ur here spiting someone who is making it. Soon she would get married and her life would be almost perfect while u se sit and throw insults @ other people way better than u. Ur lives are pathetic…and I think u 2 shuld get a life!

    • Ifeany ifyco

      September 26, 2013 at 1:53 PM

      E be like say we get 2 Ifeanyi 4 dis house, biko let me here by change my name to Ifyco maka ndi uta. @Linda all u need is Christ

  15. tee

    September 26, 2013 at 4:06 PM

    its not funny when making fun of someone cause everything happens in its own time.naijagist,its not funny stop making fun of her cause no one would ever write such proposal.

  16. Gentlevic

    September 26, 2013 at 4:29 PM

    Let her come I will marry her.

  17. Neekee

    September 26, 2013 at 7:34 PM

    Linda dnt worry those dt condem u wl celebrat wt u later.some r frustratd whil some r jeolous.so relax ur mind s comin

  18. George Goddard

    September 26, 2013 at 11:32 PM

    Linda kindly call me on this number +97466582864 I’m interested in you,I’m so much found of you I admire and cherish u so much,I’m a nigerian but stays in doha just call me

  19. NIMI GODSWILL

    September 27, 2013 at 9:50 AM

    PLS I WILL LIKE TO MARRY U IF U WILL LIKE ME, PLEASR CALL ME ON 08062097055 OR IF U DON’T MIND, PLS UR NUMBER . THANK U AND GOD BLESS.

  20. God'schosen

    September 27, 2013 at 3:32 PM

    Linda i know you must have seen a lot of man you don’t like despite they have money.i want you to know if you must fine love and the type of man in your heart.care for the seeker and live in spirit of love.thanks

  21. red

    September 28, 2013 at 12:22 AM

    Every single day is always a life lesson for me,I thought they said that that all women are gold digger? from what am reading here,some men came with tractors to dig linda’s life not only her gold. Including international di**s.Linda look at d heat ur name is generating!!!!!!!!!!! linda,RED is telling u with every thing I believed in that u will definitely marry ur own already made husband and not those hood rats looking for who to sank their rotten fangs into.And now I don’t who deserves that tittle..keep waiting for rich ladies to “catch” while ur mates are producing kids and planning for their RETIREMENT.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

More in Hot Gists

To Top