May 22, 2016 – My Nigerian Husband Has Changed, Love Is Gone From Our Marriage Of 10 Years – Lady Laments
Our marriage is almost 10 years old, but I don’t know who to turn to for advice.
The last two years I sense a change in my husband’s behaviour, but I don’t know where it comes from. His cold attitude towards me is making me nervous.
He never gave me reasons to be jealous of him so far, but I have certain doubts that he wants his freedom and whenever I try to question about the way his behavior towards me, he gets even more irritated.
He usually doesn’t go out alone, sometimes with friends, as far as I know. But I can’t explain why he doesn’t share with me and doesn’t want to talk to me like with other women. He doesn’t show any feelings towards me. I often talk about my feelings and constantly repeat how much I care about this marriage.
When I see him talk and laugh with another woman I feel painfully jealousy. How can I make him treat me as he treats others, feel his desire to be with me?
He wants to be interesting and catching for the others, but as far as I am concerned, he acts as if he doesn’t care. I can’t seem to decide why love disappears after so many years of marriage.
I feel very bad when I see him talking to another woman. I have often thought I should also find someone, but I won’t be happy, I want only him. And I know divorce is not the right decision. I ended all my contacts with friends and family, I only want to go out with him.
This has to change, but it is so difficult. Trust me, I am helpless. I even searched through his phone, just to prove my doubts, but I found nothing. He is either very discreet or I have no reason to doubt him.
I don’t even have the strength to be with another man, I feel so deeply hurt and disappointed.
Please advise on the best way to handle this.
[Tope writes from Lagos]