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“Toke Makinwa’s Husband Maje Ayida Is A Sex Addict” – Etcetera Suggests

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“Toke Makinwa’s Husband Maje Ayida Is A Sex Addict” – Etcetera Suggests

toke makinwa husband sex addict

July 19, 2015 – “Toke Makinwa’s Husband Maje Ayida Is A Sex Addict” – Etcetera Suggests

Singer turned writer Etcetera has released a new article about the controversy surrounding OAP Toke Ayida and her soon-to-be estranged hubby Maje Ayida.

Read the article below

When you heard the news that Toke Makinwa’s husband impregnated his girlfriend, you all took to social media to rain insults on Nigerian men. Why men cheat on women they love became a topic for all female radio presenters in the country. Aren’t you all tired of asking the same question over and over as if it is some perplexing unfathomable mystery? Your question is rhetorical, but since it keeps coming up again and again, let me provide some explanations to help you understand the reasons.

I will simply tell it like it is, with no bull, tact, or political correctness. It’s just that oftentimes; women do not accept the explanations. But in fact, one can understand it through common sense. Sometimes a man would cheat on his wife or girlfriend because he doesn’t love her anymore; he is bored with her, or even possibly unhappy with their relationship.

In such scenarios, even women can become unfaithful as well. Women must understand that men are fundamentally different from them and wired differently too. We all know this but feminists try to suppress or deny this universal fact. A man craves variety and seeks novelty, while women prefer familiarity. Men will naturally desire variety when it comes to romantic/sexual partners more than women will. Men easily get bored by the same thing every day or a routine and we are sometimes afraid to voice this. Think about this.

You ate your favourite eba and egusi soup, and on the second day that you ate it, the pleasure would be noticeably less than the first day. And after a week of eating it, you’d get tired of it and start to strongly desire to eat something else. Your desire for that eba will have diminished at that point.
I know what you are thinking now, “You can’t compare food with people” right? That’s the typical female reaction to this analogy.

However, I’m sorry to say that this analogy does apply because it’s one of the best and simplest ways that it can be explained. I am not trying to objectify people. But by accepting such an analogy, it will start making sense to you that men are more visually stimulated than women are. And when a man relies on visual stimulation for arousal, the stimulation wears off at some point, which then requires new stimulation from new women. Got the drift? In other words, visual stimulation is a sensual thing that is fleeting in nature and requires constant variety in order to maintain the stimulation. Thus, men who seek visual stimulation will require variety from more than one partner or lover. Women often argue that “true love” never gets old. But the notion of “true love” is indefinable, very personable, and highly subjective. And even for the sake of this argument, if we agree that “true love” never gets old and never wears out, that still doesn’t change what we’re talking about here.

You see, even if a man has true everlasting unending love for his woman, he can STILL desire another woman he fancies. That’s what our women have to understand, rather than cling to naïve clichés of society. A woman’s heart tends to be able to love only one man at a time, a man’s heart is different and can truly love MORE THAN ONE woman at a time. This might be hard for you to accept, and unfathomable to your values and beliefs about “love.” But it is the truth. A man’s heart is molded differently with multiple chambers that enable him to love and desire multiple women. It’s like a tree with different branches, rather than just one. Men usually won’t admit it, because our society doesn’t accept this, but condemns it.
Ladies, to understand this, think about all the different colours you love. You love pink and sky blue, or red, blue, black and purple.

Now, can you like more than one colour at a time? Of course you can! You like the different colours in different ways, on different things, and for the different ambiance and mood that each colour accentuates, right? Likewise, you can like more than one type of cuisine right? Can you like Chinese and Italian foods at the same time? Of course you can. Even if society said you could only like one type of cuisine, it wouldn’t make a difference, would it? After all, society may attempt to create mutually exclusivities, but reality doesn’t. These are painfully obvious examples, and I am not arguing that people are like colours or food, but such simple analogies do describe what’s going on inside those who love more than one person or like having many lovers. Just because a man tells more than one woman that he “loves her,” desires her, or has feelings for her, does NOT make him a “playboy” or “liar.” He is not necessarily “playing” in terms of acting, nor does it mean he is using people in some sort of pretend “game” where he doesn’t care about their feelings. These are just false judgements by the society especially a feminist or female dominated society like Nigeria is fast becoming.

To some women, it doesn’t make sense and doesn’t fit their definition of love and loyalty. But it’s the truth. That’s reality and you’ve got to accept it if you want to try to understand it. Not all men unequivocally attach loyalty to true love. Society might do so, but not all human beings do. What women have to understand is that being in a loving relationship does NOT automatically erase one’s desire for other people. Of course, men who have multiple partners often do have to lie to the women they romance, by telling them that they are the only one when confronted with the issue. So that is one area in which men commonly lie. However, it doesn’t make them dishonest people in general. It’s just that since most women cannot accept that their partner can pursue someone else beside them, demanding total monogamy in love; men with multiple desires for multiple women are FORCED to lie in order to prevent chaos and failure in courtship.

There is no easy way around it. And that is the case even if they are generally honest men. (After all, who hasn’t lied? Everyone has at one time or another, so stop pretending to be an angel!)
Loving or desiring multiple women has nothing to do with right or wrong, or being good or bad. It is simply a lifestyle and often these men are simply expressing who they are. Thus, infidelity does not make a man “bad” in a moral sense. Often, these men who romance multiple women are tender, caring, good-hearted, loving, nurturing people. Some are even deeply spiritual or religious. He doesn’t love you? My dear, the line between love and lust is blurry and subject to personal opinion. There is no universal objective measuring stick for differentiating between “love” (which has so many different meanings anyway) and “lust.”

In reality, a man can find the perfect woman, who outshines the rest in his life, and can even have a perfect relationship with her, but still look at another woman he finds attractive and desires to court her, romance her, and experience the wonders and pleasures of her femininity as well. Some men get a “high” or adrenaline rush from courting, romancing, or seducing new women, in a way that nothing else can, and thus are addicted to it.

My ladies, there are no perfect solutions or answers to everything. Just accept that some things in life are just meant to be endured, not fixed or solved like an equation.

Do you agree with him?

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9 Comments

9 Comments

  1. Unizik S

    July 20, 2015 at 12:05 AM

    Men with big dick are often tempted to cheat, I don’t know why I hae dated quiet a few of them

    • Derinsola

      July 20, 2015 at 12:10 AM

      Dirty talk

  2. Metu Nyetu

    July 20, 2015 at 12:27 AM

    Dis write-up tries 2 justify casanovas. D devil himself actually inspired dis.

  3. H2o_kadde

    July 20, 2015 at 4:59 AM

    GOD bless this beautiful soul called Toke,4 his perfect buh hrd 2 accpt rep on dt ? May God continue 2 enlarge ur sense of finkin ryt

  4. H2o_kadde

    July 20, 2015 at 5:10 AM

    GOD bless this beautiful soul called Toke,4 her perfect buh hrd 2 accpt rep on dt ? May God continue 2 enlarge ur sense of finkin ryt

  5. Glass In The Market Place

    July 20, 2015 at 7:53 AM

    Etcetera a.k.a ashawo dust bin, finally your rotten brain has been fucked out of your skull&all the heartbreaks have indeed taken their toils on you. Idiot!

  6. maverick chukwu

    July 20, 2015 at 11:08 AM

    there are not made for each other

  7. Jilo

    July 20, 2015 at 3:11 PM

    I really commend the writer of this article for his/her effort to analyze bit by bit on how relationship works. To be honest with you folks, we have to get out of our shell in order to know the truth about relationships. Whenever we men approach women for a date we really serious and honest at that time just as the writer indicated but as soon as we are in that relationship, at a point we tend to look out for another mistress outside that relationship. The reason why it happens that way is still a mystery to me too. I’m not supporting this idea but this is a reality we cannot ignore. That is why most of relationship out there is not working out. If you see some couples out who have been together for a while, ask them about their relationship and how they have been coping, they will have many stories to tell you if they really want to be sincere. The fact of this matter is that, good relationship only last for let say five years, the rest of the years in any relationship can be spent using scope. This is because the couples might have entangled themselves with some commitment such having kids and probably businesses which may force them to remain in a relationship even though they are not really happy with each other . Things have changed from old believe that for better or for worst. If we have to hold onto this believe, why do we have some men of God like Pastors, Imams Clerics divorcing their wives because they are tired of being in that relationship. There are many beautiful women out there struggling to hold on to their husband and men’s vice versa. This step always happen in our life’s without knowing why it happens that way. Some women take it far by going to Native Doctors to avenge for being cheated but at the end of the day, they will realize their new relationship is not better than the previous relationships. One need to be patient in any relationship not quickly overreact, stop complaining, don’t invite hatred into your relationship, don’t let the money be the major issue and make a better communication with your partner, then you will realize that you have solved 75% of your problems. Even with all these it only takes his grace for relationship to work out. My advise to some women out there, don’t kill your husband or your boyfriend because your partner is cheating on you with another woman it is man’s nature. The same thing will happen when you have another partner so what are you going to do? keep killing all men because they are having relationship with another women. That measure doesn’t justify the act.

  8. Tenderly

    August 15, 2015 at 8:05 AM

    D guys re alwaz d one tired nd nt d women ba, or re u guys trying 2 say dat we re nt alxo tired of seeing same di*k al d tym?..Wel d only reason i’l stay faithful 2 my husband nd union is 4 d sake of heaven nd notin more, cos we’l al stand individualy nd give accnts witawt blaming any1 of our misconduct..as 4 d unfaithful guys dat think it’s a mystery 2 dem nt bin faithful, shud go on nd enjoy 4 d short wyl dey live cos one day life wud b taken 4rm us nd al diz wud bkum vanity..u’ve al tasted diffrnt soup nd its tym 2 settle 4 one soup nd ur bringing excuses, aby new soup don commot?

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