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I Fell In Love With A Former Nigerian Scammer “My Family Is Racist” Pls Advise

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I Fell In Love With A Former Nigerian Scammer “My Family Is Racist” Pls Advise

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July 26, 2013 – American Woman Falls In Love With A Nigerian Man Who Scammed Me – “My Family Is Racist” Pls Help

I need advice but i need it from outsiders looking in…cause i am in love with a Nigerian…this pass march 2013 was a year that we have been together…long distance of course…i was one of those women you read about that ended up being scammed or played…fell in love with someone that wasn’t real…when i stopped helping him, he was still there and never truly left me…which if i was just a scam then he should of ended it and moved on…well this pass february he finally came clean about everything and including who he really was…i felt relieved…he answered all my questions… he fell in love with me when he wasn’t suppose to…i was just a play to start with but then his game caught up with him…we went 3 months barely talking due to his disguise and him trying to pull away from me..during this time i was so angry at him for loving someone else then actually using me…i am not a material person, never have been…either i have it or i don’t…i am just as happy…after he told me that he was Nigerian and young, i had to look at his picture to remind myself that..hey, he is black…lol…i am very blessed to see no color when i look at people…i see who they are and not what they are….

We have both tried to walk away from each other several times and we end up causing ourselves more hurt…and praying and begging to God has only pushed us closer together then letting us both walk away from each other…i live in texas and he is in africa…

I’m a bit scared about traveling there but more excited….i love change and the variety of cultures are amazing…my friends and family look at me like i am crazy and stupid for loving this man that has done me wrong…but he and i have been through a lot and no one will understand or have not understood when we have tried to explain our love, our relationship…he goes through things there for us, his friends and the doubters call him names and tell him this will never happen…we will never happen…but i have faith and so does he…we communicate on a daily basis for over a year now….

We skype and such so we both know each other…to b told to walk away from him is useless cause i can’t…i have fought so hard to leave him and him me that we have come to terms…we are together and that nothing or no one can change that fact…i just need some input…

My family is racist and what they say colors their input…i can only live my life for me and not others…can only change me and not others…

Thanks for the help and may God bless you!

39 Comments

39 Comments

  1. salewa

    July 26, 2013 at 9:47 AM

    I’m a Nigerian-American. Here is my take on this. If you’re a Christian, please pray very well before embarking on this journey.

    Another way to go round this is to invite him over through K1 or whatever and if things work for you guys then you can move on.

    • Prince

      July 26, 2013 at 12:39 PM

      How can one invite someone over through K1? What do you mean by that? Please explain.

  2. Kevwe

    July 26, 2013 at 10:56 AM

    People find love in a hopeless place. if you love him, ask him the same question if he loves you or not. Tell him to be very sincere with you…if possible, tell him to introduce his family members to you and create a cordial relationship with the family, then you can know who he really is with time…Love has no colour and this is why we people fall in love with anybody, anytime. If you need private advice on this, you can write me on jointarena(at)gmail.com and I will be of help to provide you necessary information you need to be safe and have a wonderful relationship. Stay Blessed! **link removed**

  3. Sizzle

    July 26, 2013 at 10:59 AM

    Uhmm this is serious. Pray and ask God for direction and if this is your guy um sure you people will be together. ALso you should make the guy to do some efforts you know…

  4. tim

    July 26, 2013 at 2:22 PM

    did you find him in the church? or someone introduced him to you? how can you love a scammer and think he will change? anyway i beleive this story is not real, are you stupid this texas girl? is that the way God said we should fall in love? dont waste your time because you will regrt it all your life.

    • Roy

      July 27, 2013 at 6:21 AM

      Good questions Tim. but funny enough, she didnt say she was a Christian sef oh. She is just LOST. She will be dumped if she continues the relationship. I just hope she is reading these comments

  5. Nnaemeka nwosu

    July 26, 2013 at 4:47 PM

    Go 4 yo love,dn,t let any deceive u,fuck colors…

  6. Livingston

    July 26, 2013 at 4:49 PM

    Just as it has been said above, what i want to add is this. It is good to fall in love with the person you know well, but you still have not known him very well, so please create ways of knowing him very well and whether truelly he love you just like you do or not before you make your final decision, and also note that it will not be feasible for you to get good answers directly from him because he is the actor. So it is good to pray nevertheless, it is more good to attach the prayer with actions sometimes if you are thoughting your faith. I pray that the two of you are destined to be together so that you will set a good example. God bless you all.

  7. thevoice

    July 26, 2013 at 6:29 PM

    You will be scammed the second time and am in support of your family’s point of view. I don’t think your family is racist what they want is for you to avoid someone that has ones scammed you. When you bring the guy to America, he will dumb you because he is very smart and knows what he is doing. You need to get a life and forget about him if not you are not only going to ruin yourself, you are also digging your own early grave.

    • Roy

      July 27, 2013 at 6:09 AM

      I am in total support with “thevoice”. God bless you. This lady is just carried away by sweet words from the Nigerian “smart guy”. I guess she is also far senior to him in age. There are so many nice and simple guys there in the US, why can’t she concentrate there? She is loving over Facebook and twitter. This relationship has failed from the beginning.

  8. Apeyam

    July 26, 2013 at 6:41 PM

    Pray to God for direction and listen to what ya heart says…f**k colours

  9. obeah

    July 26, 2013 at 9:23 PM

    ….. lots of black men in the US .If you look properly you will find you do not need to go far to find love.

  10. Gerald

    July 27, 2013 at 1:29 AM

    He may be playing at first time when you called him scammer but now he is real and truly loves you but may not have money to fend for you but if you really love him and can fend for both of you i bet you he will make a good husband color is in skin not in the mind so go on and God will help both of you

  11. Roy

    July 27, 2013 at 6:03 AM

    When a house is built on a wrong foundation, there is bound to be collaps in the nearest future. This relationship of yours has a wrong foundation and as such might not last.

    Watch it my dear. Your eyes and body is so clouded with love now but it wont last because the foundation is faulty. Don’t get me wrong, i am not wishing you bad but just speaking from experience.

    Anyway, everyone is entitled to his own opinion and you also have your choice to make

  12. sean

    July 27, 2013 at 6:52 AM

    He has used ogunmeh for you,and its really working.you better bind that satanic spirit before you end up in a mess.a dog cannot travel over seas and become a lion,or turn into a lion.a dog would always remain a Dog.a fraudster would always be a fraudster,no matter what.he wants to defraud you the second time

    • J JAY

      August 3, 2013 at 10:52 AM

      THUMBS UP

    • maddyson

      October 5, 2013 at 11:43 AM

      hi sean, would you please care to explain ogunmeh to me as i found myself in a similar situation and see no way out. thank you

  13. Roy

    July 27, 2013 at 7:13 AM

    Wrong foundation. You are still under a scam.

  14. Biggy

    July 27, 2013 at 8:55 AM

    Baby girl go for your heart. I have seen where such happened and it worked out between the two parties and they are living in peace and harmony now. I have witnessed it severally. So follow your heart.

  15. horlardi101

    July 27, 2013 at 1:35 PM

    You have to marry him because you have no choice.

  16. olakunle williams

    July 27, 2013 at 1:57 PM

    Pls I don’t realy understand u babe but wht I want to say is dis pls if u can remove all d luv u said u luv dis guy and put it on me I will thank God cuz since I was born hav been telling my mother dat I want to marri from america pls do dis for me to forfill my dreem and I give u my world u will never regret of dateing me u can talk to me on 08075442521 thanks

  17. maama yaa

    July 28, 2013 at 4:53 PM

    once a scammer.always a scammer! be warned silly gal.this is just a new trick

  18. kingsley

    August 10, 2013 at 2:28 PM

    please don’t might them you are doing right thing just follow your heart,i believe the guy love you that is all that matter…guy u do dis ooooo from maga to legit

  19. maddyson

    October 5, 2013 at 11:47 AM

    i would like to talk to you in private as i am in a similar situation myself. i was never scammed for money because i knew right away its a scam and warned him of that. he knows i have nothing much to offer, but we simply cannot walk out on each other. its going on for over a year. maybe we can help each other

    • sharond

      December 19, 2013 at 2:00 PM

      for both of you girls, i am in the same boat with you. Its funny that the exact same thing happened to me: met online, caught his game, he admitted it, continue professing his love, wants me in his life, cant live without me, promise to take care, no more lies, love my big body and calls it sexy, doesnt want me to be thin,,, i accepted it because i crave for the attention, but my gut has always told me at the very beginning,,,its all game..if i give in, i will lose.

      • loretta

        February 20, 2014 at 10:23 PM

        He will love you and shover you with love crap and sappy poems as long as you will be his Cash Caw. I understand it’s online relationship and you are in love with young, skinny boy from Nigerian cafe who says this daily to many women. Well all the affection in reality does not exist. In reality he claps hands after coming from Western Union and he calls you fat mugu. You are brainwashed and as long as you don’t reach bottom you will never understand. Have some esteem. I am chubby girl too but I would never ever let scammer who is terrorist, human trafficker and drug smugler to touch me. I wasn’t born to end up with trash

        • martha vaughn

          February 21, 2014 at 12:20 AM

          LORETTA: BRAVO!!! My sentiments exactly!!

      • jean

        June 19, 2014 at 11:20 PM

        Are you 3 women sure it is not same man you are in love with??I would suggest to compare notes.A scammer is a heartless actor .there is a great quote it says:”never lie to someone that trust you and never trust someone that lies to you”if a person lies to you once,he will lie to you always.Be smart, Never get info from the scammer,his family or friends they will lie. Check all out with proper authorities and communications,.I had a friend that fell in love with a scammer she met him on social site,,and he confessed to her also,,he told her he fell in love for real and they corresponded for a year ,he even came to see her.(she found out later another woman paid for his airline ticket).So i ask my friend for his email..I began to write to him and he told me same words,i copy and paste and showed her,,She finally realized,a scammer is a scammer is a scammer,that is how they make their living,please be sure while he is loving you,he is scamming another woman for money.etc.Is that the kind of man you want?? Sorry but that is truth.

    • martha vaughn

      February 20, 2014 at 10:03 PM

      Maddy: Please, please don’t fool yourself into thinking that scammers will invest a year of their time in an internet cafe grooming you for the sake of defrauding you–And that because you didn’t send money DIRECTLY [via western union]is a sign of good faith on scammers part. They have MANY types of scam fraud for victims that are insolvent, as you say this is your present financial status. I STRONGLY ADVISE you to be on guard to scammers suggestions of depositing an overseas check into your bank. This will prove to be a counterfeit document and you will be held liable for this felony type of crime. The list goes on and on of the variation of this criminal syndicate’s fraud scams on the western world. As a side note, W. African scammers and Al Qaeda terrorists are ALLIES.

    • Jul

      April 3, 2016 at 6:06 PM

      I am in a similar situation. My guy actually tried breaking up with me when he started falling for me…but couldn’t. I was always a little Leary of his story…but we had such a connection and he was there for me like non other man has been. He wakes me up every morning and puts me to sleep every night (I have insomnia)…he supports me when I’m down and loves me a thousand different ways every day. He finally confessed to me about the fact that he initially started talking to me to pull off a scam…but fell so deeply in love with me he could never ask me even for a penny. Now he has confessed the truth about everything. I have access to his real Facebook page…know his real name…and talk to him visually, verbally, and via text daily. We are planning our lives together. I am not fat. I am not ugly. He is a little younger than me. But he gave me time to let it all sink in and was there for emotional support the entire time and ultimately let it be my decision what I wanted to do with our relationship. I chose us. I do believe that people can find happiness even with a bad start. But be careful that it is true love and not that you are being a continued victim. If it is true love…he will do anything to make this work. I have one advantage over you other ladies…his love for me was too strong to ask me for anything…even after his friends harassed him. I worry about you girls who already gave.

      • Lin

        December 22, 2018 at 5:32 PM

        Since it has been quite sometime since these posts I would like to know how things worked out for these women who thought they had really found love with there scammers.

  20. martha vaughn

    February 20, 2014 at 3:32 PM

    This article was obviously written by a scammer. This is classic scammer Pidgin English. And if it’s not scammers, this young woman from Texas needs to take a BASIC English elementary class. American children that haven’t finished the 3rd grade use proper English better than this “woman from Texas”.

  21. martha vaughn

    February 20, 2014 at 10:09 PM

    Maddy: Please, please don’t fool yourself into thinking that scammers will invest a year of their time in an internet cafe grooming you for the sake of defrauding you–And that because you didn’t send money DIRECTLY [via western union]is a sign of good faith on scammers part. They have MANY types of scam fraud for victims that are insolvent, as you say this is your present financial status. I STRONGLY ADVISE you to be on guard to scammers suggestions of depositing an overseas check into your bank. This will prove to be a counterfeit document and you will be held liable for this felony type of crime. The list goes on and on of the variation of this criminal syndicate’s fraud scams on the western world. As a side note, W. African scammers and Al Qaeda terrorists are ALLIES.

  22. jean

    June 19, 2014 at 11:22 PM

    Are the other 2 women and you ,sure it is not same man you are in love with??I would suggest to compare notes.A scammer is a heartless actor .there is a great quote it says:”never lie to someone that trust you and never trust someone that lies to you”if a person lies to you once,he will lie to you always.Be smart, Never get info from the scammer,his family or friends they will lie. Check all out with proper authorities and communications,.I had a friend that fell in love with a scammer she met him on social site,,and he confessed to her also,,he told her he fell in love for real and they corresponded for a year ,he even came to see her.(she found out later another woman paid for his airline ticket).So i ask my friend for his email..I began to write to him and he told me same words,i copy and paste and showed her,,She finally realized,a scammer is a scammer is a scammer,that is how they make their living,please be sure while he is loving you,he is scamming another woman for money.etc.Is that the kind of man you want?? Sorry but that is truth.

  23. jean

    June 19, 2014 at 11:26 PM

    Are you 3 women sure it is not same man you are in love with??I would suggest to compare notes.A scammer is a heartless actor .there is a great quote it says:”never lie to someone that trust you and never trust someone that lies to you”if a person lies to you once,he will lie to you always.Be smart, Never get info from the scammer,his family or friends they will lie. Check all out with proper authorities and communications,.I had a friend that fell in love with a scammer she met him on social site,,and he confessed to her also,,he told her he fell in love for real and they corresponded for a year ,he even came to see her.(she found out later another woman paid for his airline ticket).So i ask my friend for his email..I began to write to him and he told me same words,i copy and paste and showed her,,She finally realized,a scammer is a scammer is a scammer,that is how they make their living,please be sure while he is loving you,he is scamming another woman for money.etc.Is that the kind of man you want?? Sorry but that is truth.

  24. kenya

    September 18, 2014 at 11:49 PM

    I might want to compare notes I have the same scenario. I have spoke to his mother? Maybe his mom or did he pay an actor? This is all very lovely he admits his game, however what it does is seal the deal. Now you think he is honest.

  25. Aim

    November 22, 2014 at 2:50 AM

    Nigeria is famous for scamming and spamming.Ir says 419. They are more smarter than you.Think twice before you take a step. I know about them in every single inch.

    Moreover, beware of Igbo tribe (people from Anambra state) !!! They can do anything for their business.

    Love is an impression of mind. So, it is unsure that the relation become fruitful. Once you become a fool then you’ll start hate him.

    Better you keep patience and think logically again and again. Somehow you’ll get the answer. You shouldn’t ask anyone. I know if I give you the answer in this case it will not work.

    You are the person can decide yourself.

    Good luck.

  26. Laurie Linn

    January 13, 2017 at 8:01 PM

    I know your post is years old, but I would like to talk to you privately if possible.

    • Confused LOVE

      December 4, 2017 at 3:32 AM

      You posted recently..I would like to talk with you if possible.

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