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Most Married Nigerian Women Are Enduring Marriage For Their Kids – Counselor
June 21, 2017 – Most Nigerian Wives Are Just Enduring Marriage For Their Kids -Marriage Counsellor
By Eya Ayambema
“Divorce is on the rise because of some obvious factors like the harsh economy, domestic violence, education and exposure, more connections and links to foreign cultures and the rise of feminism, too.
“Most Nigerian families are religious, and we all know that religion places the man over the woman. It has been that way for a very long time with both Christian and Islamic wives submitting completely to their husbands. Nowadays, there are talks, programmes and workshops about equality, women’s rights and so on. Many Nigerian women have come to see that the woman too has some right and so, some can no longer submit like they used to. And that’s where problems come in.
“Domestic violence cases have skyrocketed, especially among Nigerian celebrities who are role models to younger ones. So, what do you expect? Most women these days are empowered, and feel they can do without a man.
“The only reason some women go into marriages is to have their kids, and once that is accomplished, they lose interest and patience. With the slightest provocation, things are blown out of proportion.
“The Economy has left many families unable to provide basic amenities and this leads to confusion and fights. Eventually, the struggling couples get to go their separate ways. Money is the major cause of fights in some marriages, and if it doesn’t pour in quickly, divorce happens.
“Finally, I think the rise of infidelity is another cause of most divorce cases in Nigeria.”
She also proffered solution to the problem: “It can only get worse, unless women will stop getting themselves empowered. If the economy improves, people would be happy and there will be less fights and anger. It can be curtailed if more families begin to take their religion seriously where the women begin to submit and accept everything without question. But, is that possible in this age? With globalization, the Internet, access to different cultures, education, it can only get worse.
“See, a lot of Nigerian wives are just managing, they are just marking time for the sake of kids and lack of funds. Given the opportunities other wives in western cultures have, they’ll quit without looking back.
Divorce still favours the man in Nigeria unlike in the Western world. And the day things change, expect more cases. We can only hope and pray.”
Iwarefa Dominic
June 21, 2017 at 9:55 PM
100 % true i used to be there now am a happy German wife
Danti
June 22, 2017 at 2:18 AM
I will encourage every Christian to read the entire book of revelation; our time is running out fast, things are upside down for a reason (the devil) on this planet, whatever noise feminists group wants to make would amount to nothing,men have will always have greater advantage.
iron bar
June 22, 2017 at 4:28 AM
21st century challenge!
omolola
June 22, 2017 at 9:58 AM
God will see us through.Be patient and endure.
Lola O
June 22, 2017 at 8:11 PM
Everybody is the boss in the marriage nowadays. The world wouldn’t be in the chaos it is now if we followed God’s simple instructions, which is not as complicated as the laws of the government that we are compelled to follow. Women have mostly become front runners and bread winners in the home, thereby usurping the traditional roles of men. A man who cannot provide adequately for his family loses respect of his wife. Also, Western influence and trying to imitate foreign cultures that don’t blend with ours is a significant factor in diminishing the traditional African marriage set up. As the song goes, we will survive.
MADAM ERANKO
June 23, 2017 at 12:23 AM
MARRIAGE IS A DANGEROUS GAME.
THERE IS NOTHING ABSOLUTE NOTHING IN IT, THAN GOING TO ENSLAVE YOURSELF TO SOMEONE ELSE , GIVING UP YOUR FREEDOM.
THE ONLY THING THAT WAS CAUSING PROBLEM IN MARRIAGE IS THE JEALOUSY FROM MEN,
MEN DO NOT LIKE ANY WOMAN WHO WANTS TO HAVE HER OWN MONEY, MOST MEN SEE THEIR WOMEN LIKE A HOUSEMAID.
MOST MEN DO NOT WANT TO HEAR ANY GOOD NEWS ABOUT THEIR WIVES, THEY FEEL THAT YOU ARE COMPETING WITH THEM.
THE ONLY THING THAT SCARED ME MOST IS MARRIAGE. AND THE DAY I WALKED AWAY FROM IT WAS MY HAPPIEST DAY.
WHEN I WAS GROWING UP I LIVE WITH MANY MARRIAGE COUPLES AND I WITNESS SO MANY OF MY SISTERS HOW THEIR HUSBAND HAVE TREATED THEM LIKE A CONNIVING LITTLE SHIT
,
THE DAY MY HUSBAND BROUGHT ANOTHER WOMAN HOME AS A SECOND WIVE WAS MY HAPPIEST DAY ON EARTH.
BECAUSE IT IS AN ESCAPE ROUTH FOR ME, TO REGAIN MY FREEDOM.
I WILL NO LONGER BE LOOKING THROUGH THE WINDOW FOR WHEN MY HUSBAND WOULD COME BACK HOME AS HE MADE YOU FEEL ABANDON, HE WOULD GO OUT VERY EARLY AND COME BACK MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT EVERY DAY.
WHEN HE COMES BACK, HE MAY NOT MAKES LOVE TO YOU FOR MONETHS AS HE HAS ALREADY STOP OVER TO EMPTY HIS SPERM BANK
WITH [ IYA-ISALE-EKO ] AH AH AH OR { ALHAJA OKE SUNA } OR { MADAM FATIMA ABUJA , SO MANY OF THEM. AH AH AH AH
NOW THAT HE BROUGHT HOME ANOTHER WIFE , I WAS VERY HAPPY .
BECAUSE I WILL BE ABLE TO SLEEP BETTER
SO I TOLD HIM TO LET ME HAVE MY OWN APARTMENT TO GIVE THEM ENOUGH ROOM TO COOK AND DO ALL THOSE CHORE AS I AM NOW FREE.
MY HUSBAND WIFE WAS HAPPY WHEN I MOVE AWAY FROM HER, THINKING THAT I HAVE RUN AWAY.
WHAT SHE DOES NOT KNOW IS THAT, I USE THE WISDOM OF LAGOSIAN. IN WHICH THE MAN WOULD NOW COME HOME TO HER LATE
SHE TOO WILL END UP LOOKING THROUGH THE WINDOW FOR HER MAN TO COME BACK HOME
AS I USED TO DO WHEN SHE TOO WOULD NOT LET MY HUSBAND TO COME HOME IN TIME OR SPEND DAYS WITHOUT COMING HOME.
MY HUSBAND WIFE WOULD END UP LOOKING THROUGH THE WINDOW AS I USED TO LOOK WHEN MY HUSBAND WOULD ABANDON ME TO GO TO HER, AND COME HOME MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT.
SO IF YOU LIVE WITH A MAN, MEN WOULD MAKE YOU BE A MADAM STOP OVER AND THEY WILL ALWAYS CARRY YOU OVER
HE WOULD SLEEP BESIDE YOU LIKE A COW WITHOUT TOUCHING YOU FOR DAYS,
BECAUSE HE HAS ALREADY GONE TO MEET [ ALHAJA FATIMA AND IYA -RAMOTA ]AH AH AH AH ,
SO, IT IS BETTER TO JUST BE A [ BELEJAYAN ] IT MEANS TO JUST BE A USER
BECAUSE NO ONE LOVES YOU,
IT IS BETTER TO LOVE YOURSELF AND WORK HARD TO FEED YOURSELF AND YOUR CHILDREN AND DO NOT FIGHT OVER ANY MAN,
DO NOT EVER CRY INFRONT OF A MAN, DO NOT BE TOO DESPERATE TO HAVE A MAN
AH AH AH AH..
anonymous
July 4, 2017 at 11:05 AM
marriage is not ‘do or die’ affair.if you are being a good wife to your husband,and he is busy frustrating your effort.,take your children and live.