God’s Will For Marriage Restoration After Divorce
Marriage is a wonderful union ordained by God from the foundations of the earth. According to his perfect plan, the two become one flesh and are meant to be together till death do them part.
Today, marriages seem to have deviated from this plan. With the rising cases of divorces, marriages now appear to be a sham.
Despite all these, divorce was and never is God’s will for any marriage. He hates putting asunder and has a great interest in marriage. Little wonder there are so many scriptural verses to back this up. Some of them include:
a) 1 Corinthians 7: 10-11 “and unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, let not the wife depart from her husband. But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband and let not the husband put away his wife”
b) Mark 10: 9 “what therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder”
c) Malachi 2:16 “the man who hates and divorces his wife says the Lord, the God of Israel, does violence to the one he should protect says the Lord Almighty. So be on your guard, and do not be unfaithful”
From the foregoing, one can tell that divorce was never in the works for God’s marriage plans. It was ordained to be sacred and serious. Little wonder marital vows are exchanged on the day it is contracted “until death do us part”.
Summarily, the Bible takes a stand on divorce- an emphatic NO. However, despite the fact that it seems to be on the rise on a daily basis, God is still reaching out to reconcile and amend every divorced marriage to as many as call upon him. In fact, there is still hope for every divorced marriage because He is still in the business of restoration.
Humanly speaking, most people believe that after a marriage has been legally dissolved, there is no hope for a reconciliation. Marriage experts on the other hand believe a divorced marriage of over five years can still be restored. If this is possible, how much more can God do being the author of marriage?
Depending on God to restore your marriage requires patience and time. You must trust and depend on him for guidance. This may take a while for it to happen (do not expect it to happen over night). Then there is the issue of circumstances, the children, faith and trust in God etc.
How then does one navigate through this difficult phase?.
There are certain things you have to do on your own part while waiting on God to do his part.
Some of them include the following:
a). Pray: You must pray and remind God about how much he is not in support of divorce. Pray earnestly and consistently, backing it up with relevant scripture verses. Remember, the Bible says ” pray in season and out of season”.
b). Trust God: Prayers would not work if you have an unbelieving heart. Trust in God and in his power. Absolute trust and faith are the divine keys to unlocking the answers to every of life’s problems.
c). Reach Out: Yes. This may not be easy especially after the divorce proceedings have been finalized. It is even possible your ex husband or wife is already dating or in another relationship that may lead to marriage.
Do not be daunted. Every once in a while, send a text, a mail, or place a call. This is definitely more effective if you both have kids together. It tugs at the heart strings that connects you both.
c). Interact: Especially with people going through the same situation or who have overcome it. Listening to their testimonies is a great way to lift your spirit. This would make you realize that if God can do it for them, so can he for you.
d). Make a Firm Decision: The decision (s) is your personal resolve on what your marriage would be like when (not if) God restores it. Remember, in any failed marriage, both parties are responsible and share the blame. The period you are waiting on the Lord is the right time to work on your shortcomings so they would not rear their ugly heads in the marriage when it is restored.
f). Do not let life overwhelm you so much so, that you begin to let go. When you do that, it is like asking God, “are you sure you can do this for me”? Learn to take little bold steps forward towards your breakthrough.
This is very difficult because the ex husband or wife may not exactly be receptive to such change. When doubt begins to creep in, remember this scripture, (Romans 8:18)- ” I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that would be revealed in us”. This would dispel the fears and doubts and propel you to the glory that lies ahead.
g). Share with Others: Just as you read and was inspired by the story of others, you should also do same when you have overcome the challenge. You may never know whom your story would challenge and motivate to get through theirs.
Waiting on God is very difficult. However, one can decide to wait in uncertainty, fears and doubts or do the needful and take the steps listed above (and even more) while waiting and then watch Him do the seemingly impossible.