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My Husband Lied To Me That He Has Never Married B4..I Found Out After Baby Delivery.. What Should I Do?

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My Husband Lied To Me That He Has Never Married B4..I Found Out After Baby Delivery.. What Should I Do?

husband lied to me

July 14, 2014 – My Husband Left His Wife In Germany & Moved To UK With Me, I Have A Baby For Him What Should I Do?

My Husband Lied To Me That He Has Never Married..I Found Out After Baby Delivery.. What Should I Do?

Here is a message received from a fan who is currently in a Dilemma.

Please read her message below and give her your inputs

Dear brothers and sisters

I think I am going crazy with everything. I have known my husband now for 5yrs. We planned to have a baby, but he was still living in Germany then, so after I got preggy he moved to the UK.

When my daughter was 3mths old, a friend of mine came to see my Daughter and met my husband. She told me she recognised him from somewhere bt was not sure. Anyway, after a week she called me and said she recognised him from a picture she saw at her friends house. She then told me he has been married b4.

When I asked him he denied it and my elder bro also called him and asked him he also denied it, then I asked his elder sister in Cameroon who also denied it. She said he has never been married before and I believed her and insulted my friend and we have not spoken since. His sister is a big married woman so I didn’t see why she would lie to me.

After 2 months of that, a girl sent me a message on Facebook that the pic I uploaded was her daddy. I asked her name she mentioned it and mentioned my husbands full name. She told me she is his daughter. I then asked him who she was and he said she is his daughter.

The girl also told me that he was married to her mum. I took her number and spoke to her mum who told me that they were married and he left her. Her mum also said he saw them few months ago and that is true because he went to Germany the same time she claims to have seen him.

His daughter is 15 years old. A big girl.

I can’t believe that, after five years and a child this is happening. What would you do if you were in my shoes?

Many thanks in advance..



  1. Okiki

    July 14, 2014 at 8:51 PM

    I have been in your shoes before and how I know it really hurts
    The first thing u might want to do is to stop blaming yourself it is not your fault most men by are liars these days.

    Now that you have found out the truth, call him and ask him to tell u the truth of the whole matter.

    Ask if he is legally married to that woman if yes, then take it from there.
    remember if he left his wife due to marriage problem, he may dump u too.

    • irene

      July 15, 2014 at 2:18 PM

      My dear i feel ure pain,but remember there is someone that can dry away those tears if only u believe, he is our lord and saviour JESUS.Just call on him every bad situation will surely be put to place.BELIEVE ONLY IN HIM.

  2. Joyce Williams

    July 14, 2014 at 8:53 PM

    Long time on dis forum
    But why didn’t u find out before you started adult play with him? Are you legally married to him? if yes, you will have to do some findings.
    Don’t be angry, just call his ex-wife and find out why he left him. Then call him to find d truth from him too.

    If u stil have a mother, call her for advice

  3. princess

    July 14, 2014 at 8:59 PM

    I ‘m based in Birmingham, I experience a similar situation.
    What I did was that I played him for a couple of months. I now set him up. I invited his ex wife and 3 kids to my house during my son’s birth ceremony.

    The I ordered his kids hugg him and call him daddy in front of him.

    I didn’t cause any scene. After they all left, my husband was dumbfounded. He apologised to me and told me his whole life story.
    I got him to sign an agreement letter and we notarized it.

    It is over 10 years now and we are still together.
    His ex wife has moved on. Things happen pls take heart.

  4. Mike Chris

    July 14, 2014 at 9:01 PM

    I knw is so painful, find a place in your hrt, to 4give the man,,,u have to go on with your life

  5. Irene

    July 14, 2014 at 9:08 PM

    Thanks ladies and gents.

    Well, he has divorced the woman and he admits cheating on her, hence the reason for their divorce. Also, I didn’t know he had a daughter and I also found a message on his phone which he sent to his elder sis to lie about everything. I just don’t trust the family at all.

  6. Bukola Musa

    July 14, 2014 at 9:25 PM

    its nt easy to 4get like that but whatever u r doing or thinking always but ur daughter into consideration. He’s still her father…….that’s ur cross and u have to carry it. May God give u d grace to forgive him and move on with ur life

  7. Sunday I

    July 14, 2014 at 9:25 PM

    Forget all that have happened your life& forged ahead.some ohers have their own bitter experience, chart a new way of life& keep moving. Take care of your child,forgive the insincere kasonova

  8. JP

    July 14, 2014 at 9:26 PM

    My dear it has happened just take it easy and hold yoursefl not to commit, God will be with you and your daughter

  9. B

    July 14, 2014 at 9:27 PM

    ask yourself ,what difference will this thing were fighting about make in ten year? In one year ?in a month?

  10. Okoro Junior JC

    July 14, 2014 at 10:54 PM

    Yea my sister, its painful actually b t, take easy. My advice is simple, if u ar d one on d pic, u ar too good to b a second wife. However, if d man ie ur husby z on money, i mean REAL money, keep on with d marriage sofar u ar nt leaving with d first wife. But, if he’s a chop money, 2nd hand volvo type, kindly bullshit d idiot. On d other hand, if u ar nt d one in d picture, maybe ur face is like obasanjos, pls stick to him. A bird at hand worth mor dan 50birds in d jungle. May God b ur guard n guide

  11. Asiwaju Olu Mayungbe

    July 14, 2014 at 11:01 PM

    It is sad and hurting to learn that he lied to you. Does he make you happy and love you right now? If so, forgive him and continue to be his wife. He might have lied about it for the fear that he might lose love of his life. If he is abusive and cheating, think twice. Also, you may want to find out the reason why he absconded from the first wife, else, you may be a second victim of abandonment.

  12. Mon

    July 15, 2014 at 2:12 AM

    Not everyone can handle the truth…anyway,it need to be told or revealed at the right time. My advise is make your own judgement based on your 5yrs experience with him.

  13. ola

    July 15, 2014 at 3:19 AM

    U don’t have choice dan 2 accept it as ur destiny,we man were liar,in as much d man is marry d woman again

  14. bezo

    July 15, 2014 at 6:34 AM

    Pls go and****************

  15. Wani25

    July 15, 2014 at 6:36 AM

    Lady Carry On Wit Ur Marriage Use D Experience Of Dat 5yrs To Know If D Man Loves U So Much,D Cause Of D Divoce Might Be From His Ex-Wife So Carry On Wit Ur Marriage And Stop Complaining People Might Give U A Wrong Advice Dat Will Hurt U More Plz.

  16. tizhe stephen

    July 15, 2014 at 7:13 AM

    I would urge you to put the past behind you. What has happened has, has happened you can’t undo it. I know it hard to swallowed dear. Pls dont approach any evil act that may end u regretting.

  17. sslove

    July 15, 2014 at 9:04 AM

    from the look of things here, he is impatient maybe bcos his ex-wife couldnt give him more children and he wanted who will do that for him. if you Love him and he does same, forgive him and move on since he is divorced. if you leave him now you are already a second hand.

  18. chichi

    July 15, 2014 at 10:05 AM

    Let me asked you my sister, did he pay your dowry? did he wed with you?. if the answer to these questions are no! How could you have a baby with a man that has not paid your dowry? had it been he did marriage rights your family members would have know from his own family members if he has married before.Mistake women do, it is too late for the advice you are asking, the best advice you give your self regards to this issue will be the best because you know your man more than any of us commenting on this naija gist forum. Good luck.

  19. Uchenna O

    July 15, 2014 at 11:07 AM

    Confirm if the woman was legally married to him, if yes please pack your things and go, pray for God to give you your own husband, the bible says in Matthew 19:4 that he that made them from the beginning made them male and female, which means that marriage is between a man and a woman until death do them part and God hate divorce, if the woman was legally his wife that means his relationship with you was wrong, since you have find out the truth, the truth shall set you free, stand by it and the good lord will forgive you and bless you with a humble and god fearing man. remain bless.

    • Irene

      July 15, 2014 at 3:43 PM

      Yes my sister it was legal and he did pay my bride price. This is something I asked his family and they also denied it only to find out that he told his elder sister to deny it and she did.

  20. edith

    July 15, 2014 at 12:31 PM

    that’s the reason why is good to no man from his village not only in city.
    se what city marriage has cause you now.
    try and stray because of your child

  21. Abujay

    July 15, 2014 at 12:56 PM

    my dear pls take heart dat is the kind of life man dis days leave and also if it takes the relations to tell u dat ders nobody like dat den u really need to ask what the pro. is and GOD WILL DEFINITELY intervain for you and your child

  22. Tonia

    July 15, 2014 at 2:03 PM

    If you still love him please forgive and continue. Nothing is new any more.

    He probably told you lies because he does not want to loose you.

  23. chinedum

    July 15, 2014 at 4:26 PM

    you can divorce him and came and marry me ok my email, i have never married before,

  24. ikedi

    July 15, 2014 at 4:30 PM

    he has eat the thing tired now he wanted to change oil. don’t let him, go to babalowa so that your command will be his wish

  25. jacko wacko

    July 15, 2014 at 7:52 PM

    Madam! why complaining? if he,s still making you happy, why talking loud? if you are done leave! you are no more a kid. you know what u want.

  26. chy

    August 25, 2014 at 1:30 PM

    men are funny ladies be wise i love you has a lot to than i lust you

  27. chy

    August 25, 2014 at 1:32 PM

    u need wisdom now a marriage that has produce 15years old child is not a new marriage if you are not legally married live that relationship and move on you can survive it

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