Interesting Things To Talk About With Your Girlfriend:15 Ways To Keep The Phone Conversation Going
Having a conversation with your girlfriend is always sweet and romantic especially at night when everywhere is quiet and cold. You both snuggle under the sheets and talk into the night. The only thing that usually ends the talk is usually when the airtime has exhausted. Even at that, some couples will still use WhatsApp video and audio call to continue the conversation.
This is totally expected as conversations are part of what keeps any relationship alive and healthy. It is no surprise that sometimes conversations go dead regardless of how you and your girl connect. Do not feel bad when this happens. It does not mean you both are no longer in love.
As humans, we have times when we get to dead ends. It is as though our brains go on airplane mode momentarily. Regardless of how intimate both of you have been become, chances are that you both must have been in this situation a couple of times.
WHAT TO TALK ABOUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND ON PHONE
However, we already know that there is no situation without a solution and that is the whole essence of this post- to show you all the numerous things you can talk about with your girlfriend (especially at nights). This way, the conversation never stops-literally. Let us start with the phone conversation:
WAYS TO KEEP THE PHONE CONVERSATION GOING
Keeping a phone conversation going can be quite tedious (it does not matter who is on the other line). This happens more so if you are not used to having long conversations. It also becomes even more difficult because the person is not there physically with you. Things such as touch, verbal expressions and clues will have helped you in sourcing for what to say.
Do not worry however because we will share some very simple and easy steps that will help you keep a phone conversation going like forever.
Ask open ended questions
Call this a general rule of the thumb. This should apply when talking with virtually everyone. Avoid asking her questions that will elicit a “yes” or “no” answer(s). Everyone likes talking talking about themselves (including you) and your girlfriend is no exception. So when you open that conversational door, she will walk right through it.
For instance when you ask about her day (which is usually the first question), she may just reply straight up “it was fine”. Go a step further by spicing it up with questions such as ” did you get to work before the rain started falling “? Did you later do your presentation today? What did you wear to work today? By asking her these questions and more, you can work your through other topics. Sure they may generate very long thought patterns, but it eases you both into the conversation.
Ask about things you both are mutually interested in
You and your girl must have some things in common- something you both enjoy doing together. It could be a show on TV, a sport, music, a book etc. Ask her if she has seen the latest reality show coming up or going on already (eg Big Brother Naija), or if she has watched WWE in recent times.
These are very simple ways to heat up a conversation and before you know, you both can weave it around every other thing else.
Ask her for support or advice
Yes please. I mean, nobody likes to feel like they are dating the cold winter- absolutely emotionless. In times past, your girl may have needed your help with an issue or a challenge and then you helped her resolve it. However, you have not asked her for anything at all.
Such makes her feel dependent and almost useless because it will be as though she is not contributing anything to your life. This does not mean you should create a challenge when there is none but if you are going through a struggle, tell your girl about it. Lean on her for the emotional support. You may be surprised that the advice or suggestions you will get from her may be all you need to get out of that difficult situation.
Share your own day as well
So after she has shared her own day with you, would you not share yours as well? Tell her about that annoying colleague, that hard-to-please boss,etc and generally lighten up the mood.
You can also tell her about the not so good moments at work. But try to limit the frequency of these so that it does not sound like you are complaining all the time.
Exactly. Make plans or go over the ones you both already made. It could be a visit to the beach this Saturday, a new movie being premiered on Friday night, a dinner date at you guy’s favourite restaurant, clubbing on Saturday night etc. Talking about it helps get her excited as well and she will be looking forward to the day even before it comes.
Share your dreams and aspirations
Beyond making plans, sharing your dreams and aspirations with each other is a good way to cement the bond. It is usually few people that know about our dreams and goals right? Sharing them with her will definitely make her feel special and will make her open up to you and share hers as well.
Apart from your future goals and what you both want to achieve for yourselves individually, also talk about your lives and where you both are taking the relationship too.
Are you looking to settle down soon? Do you both wish to put marriage in the back burner for some time? How many kids do you both want to have? Talking about stuffs like this makes you both know if you are on the same page, and how much commitment you both are willing to make.
What is a relationship without the good old gossip? If you cannot gossip with your girl, I wonder who else you would rather gossip with. Sharing gossips and tiny little secrets with your girl brings the cord binding you both tighter.
Your gossips however should constitute only a small fraction of your conversation and should not be anything scathing or overly personal. It has to be something you both feel okay gossiping about. Example, you could gossip about your colleagues at work (the nosy one who almost got herself sacked, the know it all one who wants the organize every other person’s work for them, the clueless one who seems to be at a loss all the time) etc.
Sharing and gossiping about things like this will obviously go well because you both have it in common (be sure to share yours as well). This way,
The next step now is listening to her:
Listen with empathy
we all love being listened to. Listening with empathy also called active listening is perhaps the best conversational skill anyone can possibly have. So when your girl is talking listen attentively to her, make small remarks every now and then just to show her that you are actually paying attention.
Focus on Her
In every healthy relationship, both parties demand equal time and attention. None deserves more than the other so that the other’s feelings will be mutually respected.
However, there are instances that require that one person gives the other more attention. For instance, if your girl lost her job and she is telling you about it. At the moment, she needs attention more than you and you need to give that to her.
Focus on her, listen attentively to her and do not try to insert your own opinions or assert yourself till she is done talking.
Ask her for updates
Updates and prompts make for very good conversation. For instance, if she was telling you yesterday about a new course she wants to start taking, and you both did not have the time finish talking about it, remind her today. Remember also all the unfinished conversations you both had and remind her about all of them.
Doing this not only keeps your conversations going but also makes her realise that you truly have her in mind. Only when you truly care about someone will you remember to ask about things that ordinarily have been forgotten.
Validate Her Feelings
Showing her that you can relate to what she has just said is a good way to not o ly keep the conversation going but also to let her know you are genuinely interested. Sometimes your girl may do something or react in a certain way which may be childish or irrational. That feeling that she misbehaved will be poking her. Now you coming all out to tell her what she did was just as bad will break her spirit.
Instead, you can give her an instance (real or imagined) of when you were faced with a similar situation and how you acted in a similar manner as she did. Now the aim is just to make her feel better.
This however should not transcend to not telling her when she has obviously done something wrong. That one should never be compromised.
What To Talk About With Your Girlfriend At Nights
Other topics to talk about with your girlfriend include the following (especially at nights):
Ask questions about the past
This obviously will come up one way or the other because you both will need to get a hang of each other’s past. Issues such as what it was like growing up, favourite sport, crazy or stupid things she did while growing up etc. Such questions usually trigger those warm feelings of nostalgia and would even spur her into sharing deeper childhood secrets that she would ordinarily not have shared with anyone.
Talking about this can also make you share yours with her. This way you both are catching up on each other’s beautiful past (both bad and good) while looking ahead at the future.
Tell her what you love about her
This always works like magic for the ladies. Your girl wants to know what you love about her or things that attract you to her. Note that you may have told her this a million times but the truth is that it never gets old. Even if you tell her a hundred times in a day, she is sure to blush from the inside out.
So do not ever think she will be tired of hearing it. Women never do. To spice things up a bit, you can go a step further by telling what attracted you to her the first time you both met.lt could be her smile, the dress she wore, her perfume, her hair etc. Anything at all that got you tripping, she would definitely want to know.
Talk about religion
Religion is a very sensitive issue but you both need to talk about it and reach a compromise. Take for instance if you are a Muslim and your girl is a Christian, now chances are that you both want to take your relationship seriously and possibly get married in the nearest future.
You both need to decide on how to go about the whole family tussle that will arise, how you will raise the kids. Will one of you convert to the other’s religion? If yes, who will convert to the other’s religion? How will you raise the kids? Even if you both are Christians, but probably one is a Catholic and the other a Pentecostal, it still raises some issues.
So these are things you both will work on to be on the same page before you tie the nuptial knots.
Ask her about her goals apart from the relationship
It is important to know that besides your relationship, your girl has something else she is passionately pursuing. Your relationship is very important (obviously), but it is not the summation of your lives. So find out what goals your girl has in mind for herself. Does she plan on getting another degree, switching jobs, traveling, researches etc. Just find out about them and help her achieve them.
When talking her past relationships, do be careful because it is a very sensitive area. She has exes and so do you. So steer the conversation into less volatile areas.